How to Support Your Child Through a Sports Injury

Youth sports are an incredible gift we give our kids. When done right, they allow children safe places to develop all the tools they need to be confident, resilient, healthy human beings.

But they also come with the very real risk of physical injuries.

As youth sports have begun to get more professionalized, injury rates of young children have risen. According to Nationwide Children’s Hospital, it’s estimated that “approximately three million youth are seen in hospital emergency rooms for sports-related injuries, and another five million youth are seen by their primary care physician or a sports medicine clinic for injuries” on a yearly basis. While the injuries range from small bumps and bruises to larger ligament tears or bone breaks, 1 in 10 kids will miss time in their sport this year because of an injury.

A major sports injury is often the first time we have to parent through a traumatic, physical event—and that trauma is very real. My editor has watched her teenage daughter miss various dance competitions each of the last three years due to two separate injuries and a bout with appendicitis. The first year she had to miss was extremely difficult for her, and it took an emotional toll. This year, when she sprained her anterior cruciate ligament (ACL), she was in tears, wondering why this happened yet again for a third year in a row.

My editor asked for advice on how to help her daughter through the physical and emotional pain she was enduring. I spoke with Jonathan Jenkins, PsyD, CMPC, a team psychologist for the New England Patriots and co-author of the book Mentality Wins, about how we can help our kids process the emotions of getting hurt, missing their sport, and going through the tedious process of getting back on the field.

A Parent’s First Job is Co-Regulation, Not Coaching

When our kids get hurt, our natural response is to make everything better for them and solve the problem. But Dr. Jenkins encourages us to create space for their emotions instead.

“Resist the urge to problem-solve immediately,” he explains. “Create emotional space by helping your child slow down their brain. Keep your intervention simple and let them know that you will be there to support them the entire way.”

Getting injured is an emotional setback as much as it is a physical one. While their doctors will help with diagnosing the injury and prescribing the treatment, our kids need us to be the steady support as they process the pain, both physical and emotional. Sometimes that emotional pain is just as bad and seeking professional help may be a place to start.

Normalizing The Rhythm of Rehab

The most painful part of an injury is when it happens. The hardest part of an injury is the recovery. Going through physical therapy and rehabilitation will test your child’s toughness in every sense of the word. 

“Progress is rarely linear, and frustration doesn’t mean it’s failing. Help your athlete build structure by tracking and celebrating small wins so their brain learns to notice progress even when the big milestones feel far away,” advises Dr. Jenkins.

Post-injury rehab can last months. The typical rehab period for an ACL tear in an athlete’s knee is 9-12 months. For ulnar collateral ligament (UCL or Tommy John) tears, it’s even longer (12-18 months).

As your child goes through the tedious process of rebuilding their body, your role is not to fix the problem or take the negative emotions away, but you can be their support, reminding them of how far they’ve come already.

Shift Towards Progress Goals, Not Outcomes

Because of the up-and-down nature of the rehabilitation, along with the potential temporary decline in athletic skill, your child might look at their performance and see more negatives than positives.

“Encourage them to take things one moment at a time. Nerves, doubt, and hesitation are normal and expected at this point in the process. They are not a sign of weakness, but your young athlete may interpret them as such,” says Dr. Jenkins.

Instead of focusing primarily on getting “back” to where they were pre-injury, Dr. Jenkins also suggests helping your child “co-create a return-to-play plan that emphasizes building confidence through consistency and repetition.”

Bottom line: Take it slow and don’t rush back.

If your child is going to play a sport, there’s a 94% chance they get injured at some point in their career. We can help minimize that risk through proper training, but as sports parents, it’s a reality we all have to accept.

When it happens, let’s be the parents who support our kids physically and emotionally as they recover.