When you picture where affairs begin, you’ll probably imagine a bar where two people happen to meet by chance. Or perhaps you imagine someone swiping on Tinder.
While affairs can (and do) start anywhere, researchers have found that this isn’t the way most affairs begin.
The reality is far more worrisome.
This is Where Affairs Most Often Begin
Psychologists have conducted extensive research on the mere exposure effect, which posits that the more often we see someone, the more we tend to like and trust them. The mere exposure effect tends to be the basis of affairs, even when we aren’t initially attracted to someone.
As a result, many affairs begin in the workplace.
And it all comes down to the mere exposure effect. Cheating in the workplace happens because we tend to see our coworkers every day and are forced to be in close proximity with them. Over time, this familiarity tends to lead to emotional safety and trust. The end result? A workplace affair.
Why the Workplace Is a Perfect Storm for Cheating
The workplace doesn’t only put you in close quarters with people of the opposite gender. There are several reasons why it can lead to cheating on a partner.
For starters, work is a non-suspect way to have an affair. If you go on a dating app, your partner’s friends are bound to find you at some point. But when you have a coworker, you have a reason to communicate without it seeming like anything is off.
But it goes far beyond that. These affairs tend to start emotionally. Workplace settings give people:
- Shared goals and interests
- The ability to understand one another’s stressors
- Teamwork and problem-solving
- A reason to have conversations
When two people are navigating deadlines, dealing with stress and pressure, and celebrating wins together, they tend to form emotional bonds. This can lead to a deeper connection.
It leads to a sense of:
“I finally feel seen.”
“We understand each other.”
“They get what I’m going through.”
Having Opposite-Gender Coworkers Puts You At a Greater Risk of Cheating
One study found that having a lot of opposite-gender coworkers puts you at a greater risk of having an affair. What this ultimately means is that when you have a higher number of potential romantic partners, there’s a greater likelihood that you’ll end up cheating on your partner.
The Bottom Line
Just because your partner spends a lot of time at work doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re having an affair… but it could.
Being aware of workplace affairs and why they tend to develop is essential. Not only does it help us recognize what to look for with our partners, but it also helps us be self-aware of the emotional bonds we’re forming in the workplace.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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The post The #1 Place Affairs Usually Begin (According to Science) appeared first on The Good Men Project.